1st Year Anniversary!

8 Feb

Last year this day was when my blog was started…

Before that day, Pastor had been bugging me to start a blog…

But I kept procrastinating…in fact, among those “arrowed” by him, I’m the last person to launch the blog…

Though I felt “stressed” that everyone else’s blogs were already up, I just couldn’t find the urge to start…and I did not want to do something for the sake of doing, or just ‘cos pastor tells me to do so…

I do not have the flair nor interest in writing…and I also dunno what I could possibly write in a blog…my life is so boring, I thought……even if I write, who will be interested to read anyway…

Besides, I couldn’t really convince myself why I need to commit to yet another ‘ministry’…Can I really sustain it? I didn’t want to start something that I could not see through…

It’s easy to remember the date when I finally could start the blog…

‘cos 8th Feb 2010 was the day “he” left for HK, permanently…

Couldn’t really work that day, took leave and went airport at the last minute…after coming back from the airport and having dessert with pastor, still didn’t feel that good…

I thought I would waste that day away, but strangely, that very nite, instead of remaining in weak blankness, I actually found the urge to draft my 1st blog post: Why continue to suffer? Pick the better choice!

Perhaps that’s what it was meant by “化悲愤为力量”吧…

Actually how the contents for this first blog entry came about was quite unexpected too…cos I was really blank in my mind, only wanting to indulge in all the negative thoughts…Then suddenly I thought: “what if it is not me but my cell member who is facing this situation right now? If I jump out of my situation and revert as a cell group leader, what would I tell my cell member? If I expect my words to comfort my cell member, then the true test is, can those words really uplift myself too?”…

And so, the contents of the first blog post were out…

Strangely, after I finished writing, my thoughts were more sorted out and my mood was lighter and I felt reconciled with God again…

That was my first experience of how writing blog can be so similar to King David writing his Psalms (one of my favourite books of the Bible)…

In Psalms, we can see how David would always transform his ‘complaints’, ‘fears’ and ‘guilt’ to “hope, grace & love of God”…

Likewise, many a times, my mood and perspective also changed from a wrong/negative one to the right one when I started writing the little accounts of my life, with an emphasis to link back to God’s promises…

So I’m glad I started the blog in the end…

At first, I doubted how this blog could bring people to God…

But when I took the step of submission to start this blog, God showed me how this could benefit others…Well, at least I was wrong, there are people who read blogs…

Yet, more important than sharing testimonies to others through the blog (which was the original purpose why I was asked to start this blog), I came to realise that God’s intention was for myself to benefit most from the blog, whether anybody reads it or not …

Speaking about the need to “format” our belief system in Christ and “confirming” the theories we heard in church till we can truly be convinced in our hearts that God’s word is true…Through the blog, I get to organise my thoughts and confirm God’s truth in my heart…Having the blog kind of make me more sensitive to seek out God’s daily guidance and perfect will in my seemingly normal day-to-day living. Otherwise, I may just be an absent-minded gal who tends to take God’s work for granted…Actually, God’s grace and voice abounds even in little things of normal days! I had thought it may be difficult to sustain the blog writing, but blog contents actually come very easily when we are in constant communication with God and when we can see God’s work in every aspect of our living…Just to show how ‘reluctant’ I was to start the blog, I told pastor that I would only have one blog post max per month, meaning 12 posts in a year…when I looked back, God actually led me to write 32 posts…all not entered reluctantly, but ‘cos I saw His grace and feel like sharing…

The other day, a brother suggested that we should seek out “healthy recreation” that is “not addictive”…I was thinking what kind of recreation is non-addictive? Since I don’t like to exercise or read, every other kind of recreation that I can think of and which I like seems to be addictive in some ways…But perhaps blogging can be one such ‘healthy recreation’?…ha, a few times I actually skipped my Korean drama series ‘cos I wanted to write blogs…

As I read back some of my previous posts, it’s heartening to count God’s blessings over again…

I pray that by the 2nd anniversary, more of my typicality can be drowned by God’s grace!

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3 Responses to “1st Year Anniversary!”

  1. JehovahMyHealer February 8, 2011 at 12:33 am #

    Congrats to your 1st year blogging anniversary! You have did it! Really can see the gospel in you has changed your life and uplifted many thru your blog. 🙂

  2. February 8, 2011 at 2:15 am #

    Yes. Actually, when we really ‘confirm’, God actually does marvelous things juz within a year. So there’s really no reason to doubt His goodness…:)

  3. wengang February 8, 2011 at 4:04 pm #

    Keep it up, sis. You are our pride 🙂

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