The BIG “000” Vision…

20 Jun

There’re 2 things I used to dislike…VISION and turning 30 (i.e. ‘3 zero’, “000”)…


Maybe I’m wrong, but I always thought ‘vision’ is more like a ‘guy’ thing…I mean, most of the world’s best visionary leaders seems to be males…many big boring theories, be it scientific, economics / business or even religious theories, seem to come from guys…people who kept telling us to have ‘vision’ in office & in church are also usually guys…The word ‘vision’ just sounds too ‘rational’ for a gal’s mind, which is often pre-occupied with other things that are important to us…

Being just a very typical gal, I thought I have simple desires in life…many friends think I’m very easily contented…and indeed, I too thought I am very easily pleased…just a simple dessert, a bubble tea, a TV show, a good movie, a shopping spree (even if it is shopping alone), a good meal with good company, a compliment, etc will make me very happy for the day…

Thus, I never really thought much about the ‘vision’ of my life… My mind just switches off at the mention of ‘vision’….to me, ‘vision’ is a very very boring word…I just want to live day by day with the simple aim of being happy, at small joys in my life….who cares about whether I have a long-term vision as long as I’m happy, safe & contented now…

Interestingly, however, my dear pastor actually challenged me to think of my 30-year vision when I was just merely 28 years old…I think he said that cos I kept complaining to him that I am turning 30 but still single, asking him for an explanation of God’s perfect will…well, another reason why pastor asked me to think about my 30-year old vision was of cos because Jesus started His ministry that age 30 too…thus age 30 is like an important age symbolically…well, though I was abit inspired about that vision back then, I was quick to forget all about that vision cos I was still a distance from age 30 then…

Then, just before the church camp, I suddenly remembered that at the beginning of this year, 2010, pastor asked me to draw my own picture of what kind of woman I want to be…the kind of typical 30-year old woman or a special one for the Lord?


So I know the church camp this year will be important for me to re-affirm the 30-year old vision that God has for me…Before the camp, I told God that ‘I want to hear’…& so here’s what I gained from the camp:

1) Only Face God Alone
I’m very easily affected by people’s opinions & reactions..and even my own mood & perceptions..
I’m abit ironical:
I like to have personal space yet I’m afraid to be neglected in a crowd…
I do not like to force myself to do all the ‘holy’ things, yet I will feel accused when I saw how others can be so ‘holy’ but I can’t…
I hope everyone can like me, but I can’t help it that some people just do not like me…
During many church camps, I experienced some ironies like the above…But God told me once again to just “fix my eyes just on Him”, & do not take people’s (good or bad) opinions to heart, & do not be fooled by my own self-accusations even when I think I’m not so holy…
And in this camp, it worked!
The people whom I thought I couldn’t bless, no heart to bless…
The people whom I thought will not talk to me…
The ‘spiritual’ things which I thought I couldn’t fulfill…
The spiritual strength & blessings which I thought I may miss…
All these became possible when I just face God alone…

Like what the pastor said, I need to meet God!

It’s not that I’m weak thus I can’t meet God, BUT it’s cos I didn’t meet God, that’s why I’m weak…

I’m too used to meeting God from the outside, meaning, measuring God’s love, fulfillment of His promises for me, based on my external conditions: whether my career is successful, I have many friends, money is enough, my looks, etc etc…

BUT the truth is, I can’t meet God cos I always seek Him at the wrong place..God has to be sought from within! From my spirit…cos that’s His dwelling place, that’s where His voice will come from…So I need to meet God deeper (to have same frequency as His heart & mind) & wider (in all things/encounters/time)…

2) Confirm!
Whoever has followed Christ but never ever experienced Christ’s miracles?
All Christ’s believers would have experienced some kind of ‘miracles’ before…
BUT man cannot live on a one-off miracle, no matter how great that miracle was…whether it was sickness cured, crisis resolved, heavy debts paid off, marriage found/restored, whatever, what happens next?

The joy, satisfaction & power that come from a miracle will very soon fade away…we all know that… But what stays on after the “high” from the miracles is “God’s word” that we heard through those miracles, the word that touched our spirits & remained in our minds…Only with that unchanging word, can we sustain thru’ ever-changing circumstances even after the miracles…

So yes, I need to CONFIRM that God’s promises (that HE loves me, blesses me, never leave me & has inheritance for me) are always true!

It is not ‘cos I’m perfect or I’d done right, that made God’s promises come true…BUT God’s promises are already true to begin with, thus they will surely be fulfilled, regardless of my faith level & human qualities…

I realize my joy is not to the fullest because I do not know myself enough…at least not to the depth of how God knows me..how He views me, values me, is pleased & hopeful about me…I know many spiritual truths, but it’s time to go into deeper confirmation…

3) Vision-Driven Life
During this camp, a few spiritual ‘travelmates’ from overseas amazed me with their lives, more specifically, the VISION in their lives…
I saw that they had more serious problems/struggles than me…
BUT their contentment, drive, energy, JOY and hope far exceed mine…
How is this so?
The common point they all have: A vision-driven life!
I realized that though I’m easily contented and not especially ambitious in life, men are created such that simple pleasures just can’t gratify us, unless we discover the purpose of our existence in Christ
Without a vision in life, even if we have the happiest family, best husband, get to have fun every day, it will come to a point where everything just seemed so boring…the blissful family life becomes boring, it starts to become bland hanging around with our favorite company, favorite activities (playing, eating, entertainment, etc) start to be unexciting…

Yes, though I do not have very serious ‘problems’ in life, I realized I’m contented yet not 100% contented, I’m happy yet not 100% joyful…because I have not fully connected my life with the purpose of God’s creation…
However, every time I can link my life encounters, whether it is good happenings or upsetting problems, to God’s plans and perfect will, transcending strength, hope and joy will fill me…

The key to get out of boredom & emptiness in life is to have VISION in Christ! I can’t dislike vision anymore, cos I realize vision is powerful…it can turn our attention away from our small personal struggles and convert our energy to serve God and bless others, and in the process, find our problems resolved naturally too…

So I still have another 1 year 4 months (till one day before my 31st birthday) to confirm the 30-year vision God gave me…but in the meantime, one prayer topic is to have closer network with travelmates so that the vision can be sustained and built up…


4) Lifetime Bliss?
Well, frankly speaking, I didn’t really want to touch the old issue of singlehood again during this camp…I was thinking of just focusing on confirming my 30-yr old vision…

But strangely, circumstances just made me think of this again…
First, during the camp, I got to know that couples whom I never thought will come together amazingly did (and interestingly, in 4 cases, the gal is older than the guy)…Well, I mean, 4 couples at the same time is quite a number for me to ignore..

Second, I extended my stay for one day, so that I would have chance to interact more with brothers/sisters from overseas…
Who knows it turned out that I also got chance to attend marriage counselling conducted for a few couples… hmm, even if the marriage counseling contents may not be directly relevant to me now, it would be useful if I need to give couple counseling in future..

So it seems like I cannot run away from praying about marriage/singlehood issue too…
Though God usually prefers to remain silent to me in this topic, it seems that He also spoke to me this time during camp…
As what pastor said, there’s a scheduled time for everyone to come to earth, yet there’s no fixed time for men to depart from this earth…it may be 5 years, 10 years, 20 years or 50 years remaining for me…I do not know when…so why do I need to be bothered about small things like whether I will get married if I’m only left with say, 5 years, on earth?

Of cos everyone’s experiences are different and how God leads me will be different from how He leads others…yet, one thing never changes, nothing is impossible with God…& His voice for me is clear, focus on the first 3 points above (meet God, confirm promises and be vision-driven), and lifetime bliss (whether from marriage or singlehood) will naturally come! No vision = No lifetime bliss 🙂

Hmm, you may have other concerns which may be different from mine…but whatever it is, I believe the ‘way’ is the same…when we focus on the internal: Seeking to meet God, confirm His promises and be vision-driven, the external: our hearts’ desires will naturally be gratified…

P.S.: I know my blogs are very long, just pretend that you are reading many many blog entries in one. God bless you as you read! 🙂

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12 Responses to “The BIG “000” Vision…”

  1. Grant me a little vision June 20, 2010 at 11:33 pm #

    It’s so easy to forget what i have listened so attentive during the camp when back to the daily mundane life.

    After i read your blog, messages come back and it’s really about “vision”. It’s still blurred unlike yours which has been stated for you.

    How amazing it would be.. our Youth Pastor. I have a little thought that i cld be a bridge too. May we get our vision clearer and let God uses us in His most unique ways.

    • huijun1910 June 21, 2010 at 11:54 pm #

      Sis, you are already a bridge right now between ur kids/pple around you and God 🙂

      God will surely use u in your own uniqueness..there will surely be people who can be touched and blessed by you but not by another person =)

  2. Greatly blessed June 21, 2010 at 9:49 pm #

    Sister, you are truly blessed cos you have received so much grace from God to have faith in the finished works of our Lord Jesus to receive all things now from Abba father.
    You have so much wisdom to seek God within your spirit as many always seek God outside looking at the circumstances. I am one of them only recently I learnt that God leads us in peace and joy in our hearts and protects and warns us when our hearts feel no peace about an action or decision that we have not undertaken. Peace and joy is the default.

  3. Deeply loved June 21, 2010 at 9:57 pm #

    I need to CONFIRM that God’s promises (that HE loves me, blesses me, never leave me & has inheritance for me) are always true!
    I realize my joy is not to the fullest because I do not know myself enough…at least not to the depth of how God knows me..how He views me, values me, is pleased & hopeful about me…I know many spiritual truths, but it’s time to go into deeper confirmation…
    > Dear sister, look to Jesus, the wonderful, eternal, perfect sacrifice of God for your sins once and for all. He confirms God’s boundless love for you through his finished works on the cross and you have all inheritance in Christ. Be absolutely joyous about this!!!

  4. highly favored June 21, 2010 at 10:08 pm #

    The key to get out of boredom & emptiness in life is to have VISION in Christ! I can’t dislike vision anymore, cos I realize vision is powerful…it can turn our attention away from our small personal struggles and convert our energy to serve God and bless others, and in the process, find our problems resolved naturally too…
    > Vision is a BIG word and after many hours of explaining still many will be confused abt this word. Do you actually have a clear vision from God to do something in your life? As for God’s will, which is also a big word, recently I learnt that we don’t have to intentionally chase after it. Just commit your ways to the Lord, acknowledge Him, trust in Him and He shall bring it to pass. If you look back at your life, there is absolutely no mistake at all. Maybe the same approach for vision. Relax la!

    • huijun1910 June 22, 2010 at 12:18 am #

      Thanks bro, for all your comments…

      Yes, we can’t “squeeze” vision out…it has to “dawn” on us…as I said, I disliked vision, but somehow over time, God Himself impresses it upon me…I believe God will personally blossom that vision…

      May you continue to enjoy God’s favor, love and blessings to the fullest too 🙂

  5. Grant me a little vision June 21, 2010 at 10:23 pm #

    Vision… God’s will…. promises, inheritances. Sounds good…

  6. 把上帝的道传给万民 June 23, 2010 at 10:22 am #

    I have read it. 🙂

  7. sophia June 24, 2010 at 1:32 pm #

    So weird that nobody leaves their names…

    Hey, I guess I am not a typical girl then, because I always really really admired people with big vision, and I myself always had a big vision…but that vision was outside of God, and it killed me. Now I have renewed my vision, and this vision instead of sucking the life out of me, gives me more life and joy and hope and motivation. It’s amazing how having the correct and clear vision can make such a difference in your life…even the daily routines of your perfunctory life!

    You of all people should have the greatest vision…haha, it seems like it’s easier for other people around you to see the vision for you! ;-p

    • Grant me a little vision June 24, 2010 at 10:27 pm #

      We are all timid.

    • huijun1910 June 28, 2010 at 12:53 am #

      Totally agree to “It’s amazing how having the correct and clear vision can make such a difference in your life…even the daily routines of your perfunctory life!”

      May u cont to enjoy ur renewed vision in Christ! 🙂

  8. liwen4lcm June 26, 2010 at 3:04 pm #

    Vision was difted away when I look at my ownself. Should wake up and back to God’s reality.. Ya, quite long blog, maybe all pastor is like that lah.. heehee..

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