Not Just Another Getaway

13 Jun

Hmm …today as I was packing my church camp luggage, I suddenly felt like it’s the ‘eve of Chinese New Year’…it’s that kind of excited joyous feeling you felt when you were a young kid awaiting good new things ahead…new clothes, titbits, fun & red packets…that once-a-year celebration kind of thing…

Well, do not think that I was always this excited about church camp…in fact, I had attended so many many church camps that this one almost felt like ‘just another normal camp’ and I’m not particularly looking forward to it…until last week, that is…

Last Friday, as I was sitting in my CEO’s office, bidding farewell to him after his 5-year stay in my company, I was impressed when he said something…he was recounting God’s blessings in his career these 5 years & found a total of about 70 significant blessings in his 5-year stay! My boss is also a fervent Christian, you see…Well, naturally when blessings are mentioned, one would naturally associate them with ‘good’ things…but my CEO started by stating all the unpleasant incidents/difficult cases that took place as quickly as barely one week after he assumed office 5 years ago…but he always managed to see blessings in disguise when God is by his side…

The short chat with CEO reminded me that I too should count God’s blessings in any circumstances

And I believe God did want to speak to me this week too…
Last Monday, just one week before church camp, I had such terrible sore throat, which later developed into terrible blocked nose & cough…even until today I was not totally well…Normally, my sore throat will be gone in at most 2 days, but not this time…I was asking God why gave me sore throat & flu when He knows I have to speak a lot, have to lead cell groups & sing in choir…& I asked Him if I have to keep speaking in office & in church, then how the sore throat can ever get better?

Well, of cos sore throat & flu are no big deal & no major sicknesses…but if there’s anything I can ‘boast’ about, it is the fact that I seldom, really very seldom fall sick…during ‘good times’, I can be illness-free for one to two years…

So I know nothing that happened to me, whether good or bad, is coincidental…because God will never anyhow lead His child…so God tells me that I have sore throat ‘cos He wants me to listen to Him…He wants to speak to me…but I am always talking too much to hear…heh…


So God kept me from speaking, ‘cos He wants me to listen…
He speaks to me thru’ pastor’s words this week & He’s gonna speak to me during church camp…

I start to recount my recent years of church camps & the blessings they brought:

2006
This was the only year I had ever missed a church camp…even all my bosses know church camps are very important to me & I will have this common understanding with all my bosses that even if all my other leave are not approved for the year, I had to attend the annual church camp….
But I just had to skip the 2006 camp due to my father’s cancer…That year was so difficult, my dad was dying from cancer & I just ended my 5-year relationship & I had to miss the camp too…Yet, that year brought one of the greatest blessings of my life….my dad received Christ!! That’s was like the best prayer came true! Everything was worth it in exchange for my dad’s salvation…After praying for so many years, it almost seemed impossible that my stubborn dad can accept Christ as his Only Saviour….The thought that my dad can join me in heaven next time covered the pain I had during that period…that’s the greatest gift from God that year…to know that the separation with my dad is not permanent…

2007
This was the year in which God healed me, my hidden spiritual wounds, with added ministry…If I remembered correctly, this was the year when God ‘compelled’ me to lead one more cell group (i.e. a total of 2 SSGs), when my faith/spiritual level seemed to be at the lowest, due to unhealed relationship wounds…During that year’s camp, God brought me to share room with a sister who shared similar relationship/spiritual problem as me…though I’m not fully healed myself then, through sharing & helping that sister, my own healing process was accelerated…Since that camp, I believe me & the sister helped each other came out of our helplessness & misery & formed a deep sisterly bond in Christ…From the constant sharing with that sister, God added anointing to me, I better grasped how to experience and express God’s love…
I still remembered, with full appreciation of God’s grace, how quite a number of my cell group members shared that they were edified by the cell group…that was how God used someone with weak faith to bless others…my heart was immensely touched that year…

2008
This was the first time I was asked to share at the combined church camp, before brothers & sisters from Singapore & Malaysia. Through openly sharing the deep struggles within me & right in the face of my ‘ex’, God led me to another level of breakthrough & liberation…I remembered on the way back from camp that year, pastor had long chat with me in the car…I was lamenting to pastor how hopeless I was to be continuously in same struggles and over-indulgence in things that doesn’t please God…heh, that was when our ‘smart’ pastor handed me another ministry, the translation ministry…he said by translating the Sunday message every week, it would keep me from wild thoughts & meaningless activities…well, I guess, in a way that’s true…in fact, though I was quite stressed about having to commit to one more ministry, I found myself quite enjoying it actually…

2009
Needless to say, last year’s camp was an important year of affirmation /ordination for me before God & men…Just when I thought my spiritual life was going a bit down the drain, God re-affirmed His love and calling for me as His child. During the camp that year, God unblocked a little more of my stuck mindset…& one physical miracle that took place after that camp was that me & my ‘ex’ really ‘patched up’…not in the sense of getting back to our status in the past, but the awkwardness & sourness between us totally collapsed after the camp…we were able to be normal friends again, talked normally, etc…it’s like the knots within our hearts were untied…But what was more important was that I received much assurance & hope from the camp message last year, to believe that my future will be bright & hopeful in Christ, whether or not I remain single or get married later on…I even remembered telling pastor in the car back home that actually it was not so scary/bad to be single all the rest of my life mah….haha, of cos that faith was as of last year…

2010
And so, it comes to the 2010 camp now…
As I looked back, I can’t help but notice that sometimes God works contrary to my feelings…
I have been thinking that I’m drifting away from God, becoming weaker year by year, seriously! From 2006 to 2010, I seem to reach a state of numbness / complacency…Yet, God’s favor just kept adding upon me year after year…He is using me more and more every year…It is not my conditions/qualities but His pleasing will after all…

If God has been consistently blessing me over the years, I’m sure this year He has a voice for me too… I do not know what He is going to tell me, but “Lord, I want to listen”…

So this one week is not merely a getaway…some of my friends asked me what do I do in church camp, what’s so interesting that I have to go every year? Well, the camp is for me to deal with prayer topics that are buried deeply away, too busy to be looked into in normal days…It is for me to meet God more intensely, without distraction of daily lives…a retreat to revisit my spirit & reconnect with the purpose & joy of God…

How about you? I can’t point out exact examples of God’s grace on you, as I have not lived in your shoes before…But if my CEO could identify 70 blessings & if there are God-bestowed blessings in my life…& if Christ never changes, your life will surely have blessings too…whether it is about church camps or your daily lives, as long as Christ is holding your hands, blessings will abound (just that sometimes they are in disguise)!

May God bless your week ahead! 🙂
See you after my church camp!


Advertisements

3 Responses to “Not Just Another Getaway”

  1. suyun2710 June 13, 2010 at 11:01 pm #

    Hi sister, reading your blog, I so want to say “Lord, I want to listen…” too. It’s great you have recalled all the blessings and breakthroughs God has given you over the past few years of church camp. I am so “inspired” to want to hunt out the breakthroughs I had too!! Great post.

    • huijun1910 June 14, 2010 at 12:01 am #

      heh..so may everyone of us get to hear His exclusive voice for us over the next 4 days in camp…

  2. sophia June 15, 2010 at 3:53 pm #

    Whoa, so touching….I loved this post and seeing the progression of all your blessed receivements from the church retreats. Haha, I got a sore throat too, and that was the exact voice I received from God, too!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: